Doyle lay curled up against his lover's side, his head tucked into the curve of Bodie's neck. Bodie's arm was lax across his shoulders, his breathing quiet, but Doyle was uncomfortably awake in their dark bedroom. He shifted, tapped a finger restlessly against Bodie's chest. "You're awfully quiet."
Bodie languidly nuzzled at his hair. "'M asleep."
"I don't mean now."
Silence again, but Doyle could tell the difference, knew by his sudden stillness that Bodie was as awake as himself, now. He shut his eyes a moment, opened them again.
"Yeah," Bodie acknowledged finally. "Bother you, does it?"
Doyle was silent for a while, thinking. Their lovemaking had been good from the beginning, and tonight had been no exception. But Bodie was so soundless, always, his breathing regular and deep, until Doyle began to feel uncomfortably self-conscious about his own moans and murmurs. It made it hard to judge his lover's state of arousal, with no clues until the very end, when Bodie's hands would tighten on him in orgasm. And more than that...
"Well," he said finally, making a joke out of it though it wasn't really funny at all, "a fella likes to hear he's appreciated, y'know."
Bodie's arms came down and tightened around him. But still, he said nothing.
Doyle hugged back, then freed himself and propped himself on one elbow. "You like to hear me," he pointed out reasonably. "Stands to reason I'd like the same, don't you think?"
Bodie turned to look at him, dark eyes shadowed in the dimness of the night, then turned his head away against the pillow. "I know, Ray. And you know I like to hear you--turns me on something fierce. But I-- I'm just in the habit of being quiet. Always have been."
Doyle poked him in the ribs. "Her folks asleep upstairs, were they? Had to keep still for fear of wakin' 'em?"
Bodie lifted a hand and brushed it slowly through the curly hair above him. "No. In the jungle-- Had to be quiet, Ray. You never could tell how close they might be. Had to be quiet, always."
Doyle considered this, then lay down again and pulled Bodie into his arms. "There's no one here but me, mate. No one lurkin' to jump you." Bodie snorted at this, and Doyle shut him up with a kiss. "Knock it off, you know what I mean. Just--I'd like to hear you, Bodie. Like to hear what I'm doin' to you sometimes. It turns me on to know I can do that to you." He pulled the other man's head close and kissed him deeply and thoroughly, lovingly. Bodie's arms came around his shoulders, his hands rubbing the muscles of Doyle's back, kneading his spine as their tongues met. Doyle murmured in pleasure, arching back into the capable hands, then smiled as a tentative, clearly self-conscious, husky sound came from Bodie.
"'S'all right," he grinned, breaking the kiss, "don't strain yourself, love, it'll come to you. Let's get some sleep, though, shall we; Cowley's gonna want us bright and cheery tomorrow."
Bodie seized on the change of subject with clear relief. "Bloody babysitting jobs," he grumbled, settling Doyle's head on the pillow beside his own. "As if we didn't have anything better to do--"
Doyle poked him again. "You know we do, an' I know we do, but I think the Cow would not take kindly to our havin' it off on CI5 time. So put a sock in it and go to sleep."
Compliantly, Bodie proceeded to do just that. Feeling considerably better, Doyle wrapped an arm around Bodie's broad chest and fell asleep himself.
The next day was exactly as boring as Bodie had gloomily predicted, as they kept a wary eye on a nervous East German defector with terrorist connections who were not likely to be pleased with their erstwhile compatriot's new choice of friends. He slunk about the safehouse and questioned them in broken English time and again about CI5's precautions for his safety, until Doyle found himself half-wishing someone would try to take him out, if only to provide a change of pace. Catching himself on that thought, he told himself firmly to relax and got up to make a cup of tea. Stirring it absently, he watched Bodie reporting in on R/T in the next room, and began to smile. They'd left things a bit up in the air the night before...
Jax and Marriott were fifteen minutes late to take over for the night shift, and were arguing ferociously as Bodie went to meet them at the door. They brushed past as Bodie exchanged an amused look with Doyle and caught the jacket his partner tossed to him. "Hoy, you two, knock it off a moment!'
"--and how you could forget to notice you're running out of petrol--what, Bodie?"
Bodie laughed. "Ought to take better care of your partner, Marriott. Now Ray, here, he'll do anything for me: drive for me, make me supper if I'm feeling poorly--"
"Starch your shorts," added Doyle genially. "Hi, Jax. Got a ride with your partner, did you?"
"Temporary partner," emphasized Jax fiercely. Marriott finished reporting in for duty, switched off his R/T and glowered at the older agent.
"You don't like it, buddy, you can walk the next time you find yourself short of wheels. Besides, I wasn't the only one in the car, you could have said something if you saw we were runnin' short!"
As Jax drew breath to respond, Bodie caught Doyle's arm and pulled him out. "Let's get out of here before they pull guns, sunshine. Almost makes me appreciate you, it does!"
"Look on the bright side, at least they won't be bored. Gimme the keys."
Bodie unlocked the passenger door for himself and tossed the car keys over to his partner. "Playing chauffeur, are you? I told Jax, you'll do anything for me--"
"Nah," Doyle interrupted, "just didn't trust you to check the petrol. What're you makin' for supper?"
They compromised on Indian takeaway, with beer already in the flat, and left nothing of the meal but a litter of cartons in the kitchen. Doyle came back from stacking plates in the sink to find Bodie ensconced in their old armchair, pushed against the wall to compensate for the broken strut in its back, his feet propped on the low, wide stool before it. He grinned to himself, remembering the idea that had come to him earlier that day, and perched on the chair's padded arm, handing Bodie the bottle of beer he had brought.
"Thanks." Bodie took it and drank deeply, then looked up. "You're not having any?"
"We're sharing this one." Holding Bodie's eyes, Doyle took the bottle back from him and put its neck to his own mouth, feeling the glass still warm from Bodie's lips. He knew Bodie was watching him as he tilted his head back and drank, his throat bobbing, and handed the bottle back. Bodie met his eyes as he took it, somewhat confused by Doyle's intensity.
"Ray?" he asked, but Doyle leant down across him and stopped Bodie's half-formed question with his lips.
Opening his mouth gladly to his lover, Bodie was only half-aware of the hand that took the bottle from him, setting it on the floor as Doyle slipped his arm around Bodie's shoulders and his tongue into his mouth. Kissing deeply, hungrily, Bodie reached up to embrace the other man, fingers twined in his hair and a hand snaking into his half-open shirt.
"Mmm...yeah," Doyle broke the kiss to whisper in a half-moan. Bodie's fingers found a nipple, brushed it lightly, then pinched the erect tip. "That's nice...like that."
Bodie freed his hand from the loose cloth of his partner's shirt. "Let's go to bed," he said, and began to push himself up from the chair, but Doyle pushed him back down again. "Ray?"
Doyle sat up, balanced on the arm of the chair, and ran his thumb over Bodie's lips. "No, Bodie. Stay there." While his partner watched, bemused, he stood up and began, slowly, to unbutton his shirt, his eyes never leaving Bodie's. "See, mate," he offered, "I want to hear you, this time. And I figure, if I get you crazy enough, I will. 'Cause you won't be able to help yourself." The shirt fell open. With one hand he pulled it free of his jeans, while the fingers of the other drifted to the nipple Bodie had toyed with before. It rose to his touch, and he teased himself, lightly, gaze locked on his partner. Bodie shifted awkwardly in the chair, his erection pushing at the cloth of his trousers. His hands rested on the arms of the chair, but Doyle saw with satisfaction the tension in them.
"C'mon, Bodie." He drew the shirt off, tossed it to the floor, and ran his hands down his ribs. "Two can play at this...'s more fun that way." He licked a fingertip, ran it over his nipple, then put it to Bodie's lips. Bodie sucked it in at once, nibbling at the tip, his tongue working over it, and Doyle moaned, knowing exactly how Bodie could duplicate the caress, elsewhere on his body... He pulled his lover from the chair to stand in front of him, and ran his hands under Bodie's pullover, along his stomach and sides. "Why d'you always have to wear these ruddy polonecks, then?" he asked in frustration.
"'Cause you're sexy when you're exasperated," Bodie answered, grinning slightly. "Take it off, then, if you're plannin' such a seduction."
Doyle planted his hands on his hips. "Nah. I did mine, only fair you should do yours." He managed to keep from smiling, and timed his motion perfectly; just as Bodie's face was covered, his arms trapped over his head in a tangle of cloth, Doyle ducked forward and sucked hard at his left nipple.
"Yah!" Bodie yelped, genuinely startled, and pulled back, freeing himself hurriedly from his shirt. Doyle cracked up. "Gotcha!" he crowed.
"Yeah, well, I thought you wanted me to moan, not yell. Stick me with a pin and I'll jump, too."
"Not exactly the reaction I'm looking for, sunshine." Doyle's eyes were serious again, watching Bodie intently, and Bodie shifted a little under the relentless scrutiny. He looked down, away from the clear green gaze, and fell silent again.
"Okay," Doyle murmured, half to himself. He stepped forward and pulled Bodie into his arms, feeling the smooth chest against his own, running his hands over the muscled back and slipping his tongue between parted lips. Bodie responded immediately, arms tightening around him, his mouth working against Doyle's.
Doyle kissed him for a long time, then worked his way with mouth and hands down his lover's body. He stripped off Bodie's trousers and underwear when they got in the way, then stood back to pull his own off before returning to Bodie, who was leaning against the wall, watching him and breathing heavily. When Bodie tried to pull him toward the bedroom, he resisted gently. "No, mate. This is for you, and I'm gonna drive you crazy, right here..." One hand slid down to his lover's cock, hard and throbbing in his hand; he rubbed it slowly with a licked palm and Bodie quivered, but held his silence.
Intensely aroused himself, Doyle racked his brain for all the ways he had learned, in four months of living and loving together, to arouse his partner. Sinking to his knees on the soft carpet, he nuzzled Bodie's cock and balls, licked him wetly, then turned him to face the wall and gently tongued at the entrance to his body. Hearing Bodie's breath catch at the unusual caress, he smiled to himself and did it again, determined to break through the other's reserve. But Bodie kept silence after that, though his breathing rasped slightly in his throat. Doyle slid a finger into him, probing gently, and Bodie pushed back against it. Doyle moaned at the response and reached for himself with his other hand.
"Do you like it, Bodie, mate?" he whispered. "Tell me you like it." But Bodie's only response was his breathing, deep and harsh, as he stood with both hands braced flat on the wall, head down.
"Ah, mate," Doyle sighed, and got to his feet again, somewhat disturbed. Bodie seemed to be fighting, not him, but his own response, and though there was nothing Doyle wanted more than to hear Bodie let go all control, he felt something amiss in their lovemaking. Wanting to be closer, as close as possible, he reached out one foot and hooked the low hassock to him. Nudging Bodie's feet apart, he pushed the stool behind him and stood on it, reaching around Bodie's hips to caress his stomach and cock.
"C'mon, then," he murmured into the bowed neck before him. "You're a bit too tall for this normally, but I've got just the thing..." Bodie reached behind himself and stroked one hand down Doyle's flank, then brought it between them and curved his palm around Doyle's cock.
Doyle gasped in pleasure, pushing forward into the warm grip. "Oh, yeah...touch me, Bodie, love..." he muttered, his own hands growing more urgent on his partner. "God, I want you so much...want to make it good for you..." Bodie was still silent, and despite his arousal, worry nagged at Doyle. He was doing everything he could think of to excite his lover, and it didn't seem to be enough, and soon there would be nothing left to try. "D'you want this?" he asked quietly, concern edging the huskiness of his voice.
Bodie's hand tightened on him, and he muffled a gasp in the smooth skin of a shoulder. "Yeah," said Bodie, without looking around. "Do it, Ray..."
Relief welled up in him; he hugged the broad chest and nibbled at the sensitive earlobe before him. "All right," he whispered, "but give me a minute. Don't wanna hurt you..." He sank to his knees again, pulled Bodie's cheeks apart and began to lave him with wide, warm strokes of his tongue, wetting him thoroughly in preparation for what was to come.
"You haven't...done that before." Bodie's voice broke slightly, and Doyle smiled. He hadn't been sure he wanted to, but Bodie's tiny, involuntary reaction of several minutes before had decided him. Anything, anything to break through that reserve... He pressed a kiss to Bodie's left buttock and stood up again. "Lick your hand," he instructed, and when Bodie obeyed, he took it and rubbed the wet palm over his own cock, while Bodie supported himself against the wall with his other hand. Then, one hand on Bodie's hip, steadying him, he used the other to guide himself slowly into the warm, tight recess of his lover's body.
"Oh, christ, mate...feels so good..." Bodie was leaning forward slightly, nails white with pressure against the wall, his head bowed; Doyle slipped his hand around to cradle the heavy testicles, and felt Bodie shiver in response. He pulled out and thrust in again, slowly, deeply, his legs trembling with the effort to hold back, to drive Bodie ahead of him into ecstasy. But even using all his skill, hands ranging over all the secret pleasure places he had sought out and discovered on his lover's body in the past months, Bodie's harsh breathing was still the only sound his partner made, exhalations in time with the powerful thrusts into his body.
Finally, Doyle slowed his motion, drew his partner back into his arms, crossing his palms over the hairless chest. At a loss, he stroked his hands gently over Bodie's skin, not knowing what else to try. Moving his fingers up to his neck and face, he felt, with surprise, the desperate tension there, the jaw muscles clamped, the eyes screwed shut.
"Bodie?" His fingers repeated the question over the taut skin. "Bodie, mate, what is it?"
Bodie leant his head back on his partner's shoulder, accepted without response the kiss Doyle pressed onto his cheek. "'M sorry, sunshine," he muttered.
"Sorry? What for?" Doyle's hand touched the dark hair in an utterly unsexual, gentle caress.
"I can't...do what you want, Ray. It's not you, it's me. I'm just not...comfortable with it."
Doyle was silent for a moment, then reached out and gently pulled Bodie's hand from the wall, holding it in a gesture that was as intimate, in its own small way, as his cock still buried in Bodie's body. He rubbed his thumb softly over the fingers twined with his own.
"Ah, mate," he said ruefully, "been goin' at this all wrong, haven't I? 'S not somethin' I'm tryin' to drag out of you, love. It's something I want to share with you...don't you know how you turn me on?" He kissed Bodie's cheek again. "What makes you uncomfortable?"
Bodie shut his eyes. "Feel a ruddy fool..." he mumbled indistinctly.
Doyle almost laughed, feeling a great, soaring happiness, a giddy relief sweeping his body. He hugged Bodie close, and said in his ear, "God, mate, d'you think I don't, sometimes? Don't you see, Bodie, that's part of it, that I let down the defenses with you--I know I don't need 'em, not here. And you don't either. Here with me, there's just us, mate, no one else..." He slipped a finger into Bodie's mouth, ran the damp fingertip down his chest and stomach to circle his erection, beginning a slow, teasing movement that had Bodie, slowly, moving to follow it.
"Yeah, Bodie, that's it...let yourself go with it...mmm, like that..." If Bodie was feeling self-conscious, well, it was no more than Doyle had at times. Judging from his own experience, he thought it likely that Bodie had felt alone, conspicuous in the face of Doyle's waiting, expectant silence. So he began to talk, keeping up a constant, low-voiced stream of encouragement, murmurs of pleasure, soft instructions--"yeah, like that...christ, you feel so good...so hot and tight round my prick...oh god, squeeze me again, like that...so beautiful, love...sexy...jesus, Bodie, I love you..." thrusting into Bodie's tense, shaking body, letting his partner fuck the slick tunnel of his palms, until, under his own voice, he heard a gasped moan, a choked, inaudible word. He smiled, and without pausing in his own litany of pleasure he stepped up the pace of his ministrations to his lover's body, making them faster and lighter, more teasing, reaching up to finger the erect nipples, moving his other hand away from the jutting cock so that Bodie had to strain forward to reach it, to sheathe himself in its grip, then push back and impale himself on Doyle's rigid erection. "Oh yeah...love this. Fuck yourself, Bodie, feels so good...tell me you like it, tell me how it feels. Does it feel good, Bodie? God, you're incredible...oh, oh christ, Bodie, you're gonna make me come..."
And, hoarse and uncertain, Bodie began to answer him, in quieter counterpart to his gasping cries, gaining confidence as Doyle drew him along with hands and words: "Yeah...yeah, Ray, feels good. In me...c'mon, push in me...harder, oh christ..." and then trailing into wordless rapid grunts of pleasure as Doyle suddenly abandoned his teasing and thrust hard and deep, hands tightening and pumping faster on the stiff cock; until the moans blurred into one inarticulate yell of ecstasy and anguish as he throbbed and spurted through Doyle's fingers, body shaking with the force of his release.
Doyle's eyes were shut, his teeth sunk in Bodie's shoulder as he pulled his lover's buttocks hard against him, feeling the anal muscles close around him in unbearable pulses, and hearing with deep joy Bodie's helpless cry of surrender; and losing utterly his own control he shouted Bodie's name and came, fiercely, deep inside the other's body.
They stood for a long moment, swaying slightly; then Bodie pulled away. In answer to Doyle's muffled sound of protest he said, "I want to hold you," and turning around pulled the other man into his arms. Doyle was still on the stool, and Bodie rested his head on his partner's shoulder, relishing the oddness of being the shorter.
Doyle's hands stroked his back. "How're you feeling, love?"
"A little foolish," Bodie answered honestly. "But not too much."
Doyle bent and kissed him. "You'll get used to it. I'm rather pleased with the result, myself." He stepped off the stool. "C'mon, let's get layin' down before my legs give out."
Bodie's hand on his arm stopped him turning toward the bedroom. "Ray? Did it bother you that much?"
Doyle considered the question. "Yeah, I guess it did. Not all the time, and I'm not askin' you to bring the neighbors knockin' every night to find out who's stranglin' the cat. Just...'s nice to be appreciated. And--" The green eyes twinkled. "With you so quiet, and me moanin' and yellin'--I feel a ruddy fool sometimes."
"We'll be fools together then."
Doyle took his hand, the same intimate caress of before. "Nah. We'll be lovers, an' share it. C'mon, mate. Time for sleep." Hand in hand, sharing a silence that was no longer awkward, they went together into the bedroom.
-- THE END --