The Wrong Trousers


Doyle strained the tea bag as he removed it from Bodie's mug, and dumped it in the bin. He picked up the mug and started to walk towards the bedroom to leave it for his partner and lover, who was taking a shower, having taken a tumble straight into some grease earlier.

The bedroom door was closed, and he stopped a little way from it, a frown forming across his sensual features. It was unlike Bodie to shut him out like this. As he approached the door again, a series of grunts, gasps and groans registered. He knocked on the door.

"Bodie? I've brought your cup of tea. Are you all right in there?"

A long silence followed, then finally Bodie replied in a quiet voice.


"What's wrong? Are you hurt? Ill?"

"No." Again the same quiet tone.

Ray was aware of the frustration and just a hint of panic creeping into his voice. "Well, what then?"

Bodie opened the door a fraction, and peered round it sheepishly.

"The only clean pair of trousers I've brought with me, and they've shrunk in the wash. They're practically cutting the family jewels in two!" He swung the door open to allow Doyle a closer inspection.

"You sure you just haven't put weight on? I wouldn't be at all surprised, the amount of junk you shove into your body."

"Of course I'm bloody sure! Everything else fits me."

With great difficulty, Ray put the cup down, before he scalded himself. He slowly circled around Bodie, noting with growing interest how the tightness of the fabric against his partner's body clung to his thighs and buttocks, emphasising the muscularity of his attributes. It truly was a sight for sore eyes, and he felt extremely tempted to push Bodie onto the bed, and ripping the errant trousers off in the process, make frantic love to him. Only the expression of acute embarrassment and discomfort on Bodie's face prevented him from doing so.

The he spotted it. Peering closely at Bodie's bum, he began to chuckle. Bodie whipped round, indignant at the treatment he was receiving.

"I think I know the problem," Doyle said. "Let's see if you've any spares here." He rummaged through his chest of drawers, and then uttering a satisfied cry, held a pair aloft. He advanced towards Bodie, and gave in to his earlier temptation.

Bodie found himself flat on his back on the bed with Doyle hurriedly removing the offending trousers. The kisses lavished upon him quickly melted any resistance he might have brooked, together with all thoughts of the discarded garment, and he reciprocated Ray's lovemaking.

Later, fully sated, and with Doyle enfolded comfortably within his warm embrace, he thought again about the trousers.

"You gonna tell me then, put me out of my misery?"


"The trousers--you said you knew what the problem was. I know I haven't put weight on. You keep me on my toes too much for that." He planted a soft kiss on Ray's head. "In fact, it's a miracle I'm not as thin as a lat, all the sex you keep demanding. So, care to enlighten me?"

"Oh. Right. I knew it was a mistake getting similar trousers."

"You mean...?"

"Yup. They're mine. I must have left 'em over at yours sometime, and they obviously got mixed up with your clothes. An easy mistake to make, they're almost identical. It's only the hole on the pocket that I made that gave it away. You were wearing the wrong trousers, mate!"

Bodie started to inspect himself.

"What are you doing now, you dumb crud?"

"I could have done myself a serious mischief on those things! I'm checking for damage."

"We've just tried the equipment, so you know it works fine. But if you want, I'll test it again, just to be sure!"

And seeing the look of assent on Bodie's face, he did just that.

-- THE END --

September 2005

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